I gave valuable information to the inefficient staff of the American Embassy Sri Lanka and ruined my life

When Pablo from American Embassy shouted

"WHAAAAT UNHCR is helping you”

I saw
I heard

I felt

I knew

I was sure

I was very sure

I tried

I tried harder

All my hopes dashed to ground

when I met.............................. 

I am a converted Christian.I was writing a book on terrorism. I had collected a lot of information through my field work, newspaper and books on terrorism.

My goal was to find the root causes of terrorism and come up with revolutionary strategies to eradicate terrorism from Pakistan and else where. I always thought that I will write a book which will become a guide line for the people in power.

Dalia Mogahed was my ideal. I wanted to reach to a position like her to

make a difference. I wanted to bring peace to this world, I wanted to bridge the gap between Muslims and the western world.

The suspected House of the Alqaida High profile terrorist

There was an under construction house in our immediate neighbor. The house was on 2000 yards

Soon I started noticing many suspicious things about the newly built house.

I noticed that house was built by laborers who did not speak urdu. Only a couple of labors were constructing when the inside of the house was being built. I came to know that there was an unusually large basement in the house as large as the house was itself.

When the house was in the last stage of construction the owner of the house came to our home. He showed lot of interest in our house. It was a small two bedroom house built in the rare street. He said he wanted to buy the house. We got very exited as we thought he was a very rich man and would pay more then the market price of the house.

They were 4 family members two children and parents.The owner came to our house many times and inquired about our personnel life family members etc. Later he disappeared. I came to know through the maid that he went to all the houses in our street telling them the same thing. He did not buy any house but thoroughly collected information about the nearby and far off neighbors.

Before shifting to their house the owner’s wife came to our home. we met her warmly thinking that she is going to be our new neighbor. Before leaving our home she deliberately got upset over some small thing and picked a small quarrel. She left our house in a very angry mood. That was a signal that we were not going to be close neighbors.

Later when the family shifted to the house. My mother tried to visit their house,she was stopped by the gun man who told her that the lady of the house is sick. My mother came back. After a few days my mother again went to visit them to inquire about the health of the lady but was not allowed. I was of course making a note of everything in my mind.

Another thing which struck me was the house was built in a way that even we the immediate neighbors could not look in to it even from our roof top.. Giant size trees in double line were planted all around the house.

The walls of the house were longer then allowed in the area. I wondered how they were allowed to have this size of the walls in the Kent area where rules were being followed very strictly.

The house was usually quiet but one day I noticed something which confirmed all my doubts about the house.

It was late evening when the house became very noisy. It looked like a large number of people were present there and were watching TV.

I could hear that they were listening to the news The volume of the TV was very high. They seem to be truly enjoying some news on TV. I got up and out of curiosity turned on the TV to check what was the news which made them so happy.

I was shocked and deeply disappointed the news running on all the channels was about too many people killed in Karachi. Ambulances were running all over and were carrying dead and injured to the hospitals. Being a Pakistani, violence breakout in the city was not very unusual to me but the number of dead and injured were record breaking. I could hear the mobile phones ringing in the house every now and then and there was a great sense of jubilation in the house.

I could clearly hear them talking in Arabic.

I had a great sense of helplessness because I knew that the state actors of Pakistan were involve in acts of terrorism on a very large scale directly and indirectly. There was no way to go and report such activities.

I started digging deeper and found out that owner of the house has apparently gotten angry over some minor issues with other neighbors also.

I also noticed that their house was the only house which did not have the ADT sticker on it. ADT was the sophisticated security system and was installed in almost all the ban-glows of the area. I knew that such people would like to stay away from private guards alarm systems and any interference of XYZ persons and departments which can lead to their exposure.

The house was visited by unusual large number of people but I could not see them as when the vehicle with the tinted glasses will arrive near the house the gate of the house will automatically be open and the vehicle would get into the house and the gate would get closed.

Once I managed to see a man wearing Arabic dress with the pink and white traditional cloth wrapped around his head. He was in a luxurious white jeep and as usual the jeep entered in to the open gate and immediately the gate got closed.

Our house maid told me that they don’t have any servants and they don’t allow any maids to enter into the house,their request to work inside is denied from outside the house by the gatekeeper.

The garbage collector of the street was told not to come to the house to collect the garbage.

I told my mother about it. first she did not believe me and said that because you are writing this book on terrorism you seem to have a doubt about everyone but when I explained in details what I have noticed she believed me and got very worried about our own safety.

I told her not to worry as such people would never harm their neighbors and would stay away from any investigation and being exposed.

We continue living there for another two or three years till we had some financial problems. We wanted to sell our house and contacted the same neighbor we told him that we need money and were willing to sell our house even below the market price.

He plainly refused. We sold our house to a working couple and shifted to a rented apartment which was not very far from the house we sold.

after a Few days the couple who bought our house visited our rented apartment. They complained that the owner of the adjacent house came to them and was very angry. He was asking about us he told them “Where are those ladies we had a contract that they will sell the house to me”.

I knew their old trick of picking a quarrel with the neighbors to cut off any friendly expectations. I reassured them that nothing will happen.

Soon I forgot about the house and was busy in my studies doing my Masters. I also became very sick. I was left behind in my studies because of my interest in my book and my secret conversion to Christianity.

After the death of Osama bin laden I restarted thinking about the house I knew, It was more suspicious than that of Osama`s hideout. I wished I could report it to Americans.

I went to the same street two days after the death of Osama bin laden to check for any immediate reaction. I found out that the large giant size gate of the house was covered and there was some work going on. After a few days I revisited the street of my interest and found out that the outside look of the house was completely changed.

Now it looked like any other house and for the first time I was able to look at the windows of the upper floor. Now I was sure that some high profile terrorist was living there who did not want to suffer the fate of Osama Bin Laden.

My book on terrorism was almost finished. I was writing strategies to win the war on terrorism not for Afghan Government or for Pakistan Government but for Americans.

I always thought that Americans were sincerely fighting terrorism but were unaware of ground realities of Muslim countries and were making blunders. I wanted to guide them through my book.

In those days our old house maid visited our rented apartment. I asked about all our old neighbors before I got to the point of my interest the suspicious house...

she told me that few days back the gate keeper of the house called me to work inside that house. She went inside. The lady of the house gave her a lot of work and in the end offered her 2000 rupees as monthly pay to do the same work daily.

She got very upset about it and when she was leaving the house the same gatekeeper followed her and asked her if she would take the offer to work. She told me that as she was out of the sight of the lady owner she burs ted out of anger and told the gate keeper that she would never work for such little amount and the lady had not paid for the very tiring work of the whole day.

After a couple of days the same gatekeeper told her that the owner lady wanted to meet her. She went hoping that she would this time get good offer to work there. It did not happen the lady made her sit in the garden while she sat on the chair and started scolding her. She threatened her that she would cut her in to pieces and bury her body in the garden if she would open her mouth against her.

She left the house extremely terrified.

After listening to this story I calculated that the lady wanted to pass the message to the neighbors that she did not hire maids because she always had troubles with them and not for any other reason.

She gave her a slightly bigger dose to make sure that she would go and spread the word and not ignore it.

She further told me “I have never seen such a house in my life time. I worked in the upper portion of the house and was very unusual from inside. Every room was fitted with cameras and the lady told me that we have installed these cameras for the servants so that they should not steal from the house.

Bathrooms were strangely built and each bathroom had two sinks and two commodes”. I calculated that some Arab high profile terrorist was living there and because of the large number of wives and children two commodes and two sinks were built in the bathrooms. 
May be he is Eman Al Zahwari

She left and I was all set to pass this information to the Americans. The question was how to reach them. USA embassy in Pakistan was not an option. Pakistan authorities will take notice and will make an example out of me. I never wanted to suffer like Dr shakeel Afridi did after spying on Osama bin Laden.

I thought of going to Afghanistan. USA Embassy in Kabul was my first choice. I thought the staff over there would understand me better due to their first hand handling of AFPAK terrorism related issues.

I went and got the visa for Afghanistan. When we were all set to leave for Afghanistan American Embassy in Kabul was attacked. I got scared and postponed my visit for sometimes.

I tried to send the information on the American Homeland security sight,got through their website but later on chose not to send the information by the email.

I got back to my field work of visiting troubled areas and those who were once in troubled areas.

Sohrab Goth in karachi was the last place I visited. Someone came to know about my activities I was followed threatened and an attempt on my life was made. We fled from our house and took shelter in our old time servants house. After spending four days there we left for Sri Lanka.

In Sri Lanka I felt safer and thought of going to American Embassy in Colombo. I googled the address and the name of the ambassador. (Patricia Butenis)

On the forth day of our arrival in Sri Lanka , January 4 /2012  I called American Embassy.

I told the operator that I wanted to speak to the Ambassador( Patricia) regarding some important information. She was not available to talk to me. The person who spoke to me was Pablo, he told me that he was the Deputy Ambassador and I could speak to him. I told him that I have some sensitive information and it was not safe to speak on phone. He said he will call me later.

After some time he called me and asked me to come to the embassy.

I was a bit confused but made-up my mind that I will not give my important information to any other staff but only to the ambassador.

I had earlier read about the USA embassy unfortunate incident when the Ex wife of David Headly the master mind of Bombay attacks informed USA Embassy how dangerous Headly was.

Her information was ignored by the staff which resulted in a disaster. I did not want my hard work to be wasted.

I went to the embassy in a luxurious limo-zine of the hotel.

I wanted to impress them with the vehicle and the 5 star hotel I was staying in. Actually we left Pakistan in emergency and in Colombo went to the most expensive hotel due to the unavailability of the the comparatively cheaper hotels on the new year occasion. All the hotels were packed.

I thought if they will recognize me as a rich lady they would take me seriously.

Details of my meeting with the American Embassy Staff

After waiting for a long time in the reception area a smiling gentle man appeared. He was Pablo the man who spoke to me earlier.

He met me warmly, asked for my passport and gave it to a young security officer who started examining it immediately.

He took me through the ex ray machine into another place. There I was introduced to Mr. Mike from security department.

Mike was with a closed approach unlike Pablo his body language was not very positive. After a minute or two of formal conversation they got to the point. Tell us the sensitive information Pablo said.

I told them that I have secret information and I would only pass this information to the ambassador. Pablo told me that she was not available. At this I felt very insecure and asked them if I can speak to Ms Clinton or Director Leon Panata. Mike was with visible expression of disliking for me. He frowned and asked “how”

I had read in the book Obama`s wars how through a safe chamber in the embassy indoor video camera meetings take place. So I told him very confidently trying to sound wiser … “through the cameras.” Pablo smiled and Mike was even more upset. He started saying “ now... tell me in Pakistan any one can go to the embassy and talk to your president”.

He further made it clear to me that they were the only ones available to talk and I must tell them all.

Looking at the warning tone of Mr Mike I quickly made-up my mind that I will tell them all what I had observed about the house and withhold the address to ensure the information reaches the higher authorities.

Mike further forced me to start speaking now his tone was more like interrogation.

I started telling them everything. I also told them about my book and how valuable it was.

I requested him to have a look at my book. I had the soft copy of the book in my Samsung tab. I showed it to him expecting that he will give the tab to someone to make a copy of it but that did not happen. He read few lines from the first chapter of the book and then returned the tab to me.

I started telling them all what I had observed about the house.

Pablo continued listening to me with positive expressions and Mike maintained his negative attitude with frowned forehead and cross questions. I was confused and forgot to mention some of the important points I had noticed about the house.

When I paused Mike asked me “Has any one from ISI sent you here”. I laughed at his question and told him that I take ISI for a terrorists organization.

I further told them that ISI and security forces of Pakistan were supporting terrorism on a very large scale. I said I have done a lot of investigation and I found out that the security forces of Pakistan are terrorists in uniform.

He did not look impressed.

“Any thing else you remember about the house” he asked, I started thinking I knew I had missed some points but for the moment nothing came to my mind. I felt very insecure as I could see at least Mike was not taking me serious.

"Ok now can we have the address of the house”

Pablo asked. I told them plainly that I will not give the address of the house unless I am in Washington and I would only give this to higher authorities who can take action on my information.

Mike was even more upset about my this announcement. He made it clear to me in a strong tone that it was not possible and I must tell them the address. He further said that I give the address to them or its over. Upon this I took a promise from them that they will pass my information to their higher authorities and not ignore it. Both of them quickly reassured me that it will be done.

With a heavy heart I gave them the address of the house.

After making sure that they had the complete address of the house. Mike said

“what do you think we kill people and do you want us to kill those people living there”.

I answered him “no not at all” “Then what do you want how can we believe you?” I was surprised at his question. I answered him in a very firm tone,

“Don’t believe me believe yourself. You have modern equipment. High satellite technology look see check and find out whether I am wrong or right. Then take the appropriate action”.

Mike further said we don’t really find your information sensitive. I told him what if Eman al Zahwari is living there. Both of them were shocked.

Pablo asked me for my email address I gave him my email addresses. Mike asked me for my phone number I did not know the number of my cell as I had only had it a day before coming to the embassy after arriving in Sri Lanka.

I gave him my mobile and asked him to call Pablo so both of them can have my number.

He did not call. Instead got busy on my cell and started looking to Pablo perhaps trying to transfer my data through the blue tooth to Pablo. I did not mind but was disappointed over their doubts about me.

I wanted to say keep the phone and check it thoroughly but was scared of Mike.

Mike also asked about my studies and said that its not understandable that a lady who had different background of studies knows so much about terrorism.

After sometimes Mike and Pablo got up. Mike shook hand with me and said good bye to me. Pablo came out with me to the gate of the embassy. He reassured me that they will seriously consider my information. He told me “we will soon call you to the embassy and you will be able to see further inside of the embassy.” He also told me to try to remember more things about the house.

His voice carried a note of honesty and I was some how satisfied.

Few days later we went and got registered with UNHCR as refugees. I started waiting for the call from the embassy but the two men disappeared. I had lot of respect for Americans and was not expecting such irresponsible behavior.

After a month I sent them two emails reminding them that I was waiting for their response. I also wrote to them that I was ready for any questions, investigation etc. I even wrote to them that they can conduct a lie detector test on me if they had any doubts about me.

I requested them not to ignore my information….

-No answer-

After a month or two I fully realized that they had thrown my information in the dustbin. It was heart breaking but I did not want to give up on my goal of fighting terrorism.

I started my own website. I was now more careful, my work had landed me in Sri Lanka. I did not want to take more chances. I chose to blog with an anonymous name of Khizra Khan yosephzai to remain safe.

I started putting very sensitive material on my website. There were organized efforts on the internet to trace my identity but I was ways careful and remained unknown.

It was in January 2013 when I got exposed to the state actors of Pakistan. Now there was no need to hide. after a careful thinking I decided to blog with my own identity...

Soon we started receiving wrong calls and I was followed. I was very scared and contacted UNHCR and other Human rights organizations to provide us with security. No one helped.

Things were getting worse.

Realizing the threat to our life.

once again I went to USA Embassy and asked for help.

One year had passed when I stepped back at the door of the Embassy.. I met a junior officer Dan who was with positive body language and spoke negative words put into his mouth by the seniors. He clearly refused any help and told me that US embassy does not work on Humanitarian grounds.

I returned home. I had lost everything and now was extremely worried for my life.

It was March 9 /2013 when Immigration officers came to our house. They were banging and threatening we were scared that they will deport us to Pakistan. Taking risk for our life we fled from the 2nd floor balcony.

We went to Kandy and informed UNHCR what had happened. The lady who spoke to me said

“ Do not create a drama. Come back to your house in Colombo nothing bad will happen. You are registered with UNHCR no one can touch you”.

Following their advice we came back and were arrested like criminals and taken to detention center. We stayed in the detention center for about 25 days. Through reliable sources we came to know that there was a secret plan to deport us to Pakistan.

I also heard that I was being involved in criminal cases.

A dawning man catches at a straw I called USA embassy and talked to Pablo.

I He kept refusing me any help as I begged him to protect me. He seemed to be gnashing his teeth. His tone was full of hatred. I told him that I will be hanged to death if deported. He said I don’t care.

At some point I told him that UNHCR is helping me. He yelled

"WHAAAT ! UNHCR IS HELPING you”

Land of opportunities wants to take away my opportunity to live

His tone had a note of anger and disbelief as if he knew that UNHCR will not help me at all. He banged the phone. I was horrified,

what USA Embassy Pablo had to do with UNHCR why he was shocked. What role USA embassy is playing in UNHCR?

I was amazed at his advanced level of inhumanity. I was a stinking detainee pleading for my life. I was definitely ways below the standard of being shouted at by any gentleman.

On the 1st April 2013 I was called for my appeal interview. After the interview the interviewer told me that they will decide my case on the basis of other information too. I asked “information from Pakistan?” she replied in a low tone “No from others”

Was this “other” USA Embassy Colombo and was UNHCR listening to their guess work about me. 

Horrified by this changing situation I had a minor heart attack. I was admitted to the cardiac ward for four days. My mother was not allowed to see me.

I was guarded by the armed police men and women. I was still very sick when the hospital staff was told that I should be discharged as soon as possible as I was a spy. I was sent back to the detention center with a paining heart hyper cholesterol and very low thyroid level. My Eco report was withheld.

By now I had fully realized that I was a target of people in power.

American staff had spread the word of “spy” and the order taker “UNHCR” and Sri Lankan authorities takes it for a Biblical prophecy …

The two Holy disciples from the USA Embassy church Colombo had made a prophetic prediction that I was from ISI there is no need to investigate about it. Divine words must not be questioned

The staff of USA Embassy Colombo is careless and head less. Despite loads of money spent on them and paid to them, despite sophisticated on job training they remained plain with their brain in their knees. They took my intelligence hard work and God gifted qualities for being a spy. They are once bitten a hundred times shy. They have lost the power of judgment between different types of human beings.

They neither have the qualities of heart nor of mind. Based on their guess work the faithful  Sri Lankan authorities have unleashed on us. UNHCR has been dictated not to grant me refugee status....We are on our way to be deported to be sent to be killed.

We fled from the detention center and Now are on the run from Sri Lankan authorities. Our passports confiscated. we live in extreme fear.

Its a shame for UNHCR that a peaceful blogger is on the run from Sri Lankan authorities along with her mother and 11 years old sister, and they are happily watching the show.

It’s a shame for America that their inefficient staff has declared me a wrong person based on their assumptions, guess work and inefficiency. They are pushing me in to the mouth of death. The flag carrier of Human rights, United States of America touches the abysmal depths of inhumanity.

If they had any doubts about me why the hell they did not question me any further?
Why they waited for one year and plus only to interfere with UNHCR decision?
why they did not inform Siri Lankan authorities at that time?

Why they acted like thieves?

I WANT JUSTICE.

It is anything but not Christianity

It is anything but not Christianity

I converted to Christianity and along with my mother and little sister came to Sri lanka.

 In Colombo I was baptized by Pastor Romesh in 4 square church. Pastor Romesh was very kind to us. He also helped me in the admission of my 10 years old sister to an international Christian School Logus college.

We regularly went to his church till I met Kumar in my sister’s School. He invited us very warmly to his fellowship meetings.

I was very impressed with his sweet words and the way he approached me. I took it for a special invitation and accepted it. He told me that brother Andrew will call me. After a couple of days brother Andrew called we discussed the blessings of Christianity for some times and then he invited me to Mary brown restaurant.

We, me and my 10 years old sister went to the hotel before the time and were waiting for him impatiently. Soon an English man came inside the hotel. 
He was with very humble expressions and was holding a helmet in a way that everyone must take note of it. I laughed as I thought that it is to avoid any financial expectations. I was the last person to ask anybody for any financial support it was my love for Christianity which has brought me here.

We sat down to discuss Christianity and hours passed. He was very kind and appreciated my knowledge and love for Christianity. He told me that we hold two Gospel meetings in a week. He was expecting me to attend one but I told him that I will attend both the meetings. I told him money and distance does not matter when it comes to my zeal for Christianity.

We started attending the meetings regularly. Brother Andrew introduced me to Uncle John and Aunty Mary. They were delivering the message of God in the fellowship meetings.

Over the passage of time we got very attached with all of them. They often used to come to have lunch with us at our home.

I was closer to Brother Andrew and often discussed my personnel life with him. I told him about my blog and he always advised me to stay away from such dangerous blogging. I told him that I am pursuing my goal of bringing peace to this world and I am blogging with an anonymous name so it’s safe.

After almost 6 months everything changed and I was exposed to the state actors of Pakistan.  At this point I decided to blog with my own identity I told Brother Andrew that the arrow is out and there can’t be a reverse from my position.

I was extremely worried I started receiving wrong calls and I was being followed. Brother Andrew soon realized that Things had become very serious. A bomb shell fell on me when he told me that,

 “Things have become very serious and we have decided not to have any calls with you anymore. Your calls are being traced and our calls will be traced to you. We have our people in Pakistan. Their life will be in danger”

I was shocked and very hurt.

Things were getting worse and worse. Perhaps state actors in Pakistan contacted Sri Lankan immigration Soon Sri Lakan authorities came in to action. We were taken to detention center and there was a secret plan of deporting us back to Pakistan.
 We were kept in illegal detention for almost 25 days without any charges and without a word from authorities.

In the detention center there was another conspiracy to transfer us from detention center to the jail so that the deportation process can become easier for the immigration.
  
Berma family was briefed and one day the teenager girl of the family suddenly claimed that my sister had twisted her arm and her arm was broken She was taken to the hospital and we were given warning that if any other such incident happened we will be transferred to the jail.

I was also blamed of writing love letters to the detainee boys.

 There was more to come when horrified by this changing situation I had a minor heart attack. I called Brother Andrew from the hospital but he refused to come and see me in the hospital. He told me,

“Because of you police came to my house for inquires you don’t even know what you are being accused of. We want to stay away from politics”.

He also told me,

“The other day you asked me to give you shelter. They have declared you a criminal and it’s a crime to protect criminals”-

I was deeply disappointed my crime was that I wanted to bring peace to this world I raised my voice against the powerful cruel people. I am just a blogger not a politician. I also don’t like police taking me to the detention center and police guarding me in the hospital.

Jesus Christ also did not like it when armed men took him after the Passover to be crucified.

 I am a target of powerful people against whom I raised my voice I definitely need support from my Christian community.

It is very wrong to declare me a politician and betray me.

 John the Baptist also raised his voice against the wrong practices of the king Herod and was beheaded. He was definitely not a politician. I am following the footsteps of John the baptist and my lord Jesus

I need support from my Christian community and I should not be dumped at the time when two states have turned on me.